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Miss Manners: How can I let a teammate know that I want them to use a shorter version of my name?

Miss Manners: How can I let a teammate know that I want them to use a shorter version of my name?

Sakege02 mins

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I use a shortened version of my name because I think it fits me better than my full name. Even my parents started using the shortened name when I was a child, as they agreed it suited me better.

As the manager of our intramural kickball team, I send a lot of emails to players and always log off using my short name, which most people follow. However, one player still uses my full name in conversations every week.

How can I politely let them know that I find my full name unpleasant and would prefer they use my short name?

GENTLE READER: Treating the request as an act of intimacy and not punishment: “I think we know each other well enough now that you can call me Gen, not Genevieve. All my friends do it and it’s what I prefer.”

Shortening someone’s name can be a sign of familiarity. But with a new relationship, it can be too much. Miss Manners suggests that you act as if people who make this mistake are being cautious and not trying to bother you. Your acquaintances will hardly know you well enough to do that yet.

Send your questions to Miss Manners on her website. www.missmanners.com; to your email, [email protected]; or by mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.

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