Running after a breakup: benefits and real-life experiences

hBreaking your heart is never easy, but it’s something we eventually learn to handle, whether it’s binging on the worst rom-coms or dying our hair in an attempt to reinvent ourselves. However, many people have found that physical activity, particularly running, has helped them heal in unexpected ways.

Run clubs, marathonsand 5K They are nothing new, but they have certainly gained popularity again. In fact, running was the most popular sport on record in 2023, and it is continues to grow rapidlydepending on exercise tracking app Strava. On TikTok, there is a #runtok trend It has racked up millions of views, with people of all ages documenting their fitness journeys. Everyone seems to be running away from their problems, literally. But why have we decided to run? Does it really work?

Why run?

“People are naturally drawn to movement because it’s a powerful way to process emotions, especially after a difficult event like a breakup,” she says. BJ Armstead, RSU, mental performance coach and owner of Apolo Sports Advice. “Sports and physical activity are more than just being fit: they offer a structured way to channel energy, release stress and focus on something tangible.”

Armstead adds that going to the gym or track can help reintroduce a sense of mastery and agency when everything seems out of control. “When people experience emotional pain, doing physical activity can serve as a form of therapy, helping them literally ‘get over’ their emotions,” she says.

Related stories

The current running fashion is a reflection of the the same one that took hold in the 70s. Today, in a post-pandemic world that is even more conscious of preserving physical and mental health, people are looking for accessible ways to honor their bodies and minds. Through things like movement, people feel like they can repair distress and emotional turmoil in the most refreshing way for them.

The science behind how running can help you overcome difficult emotions

The anterior insula and anterior cingulate cortex, areas of the brain that are activated during physical pain, are the same areas that are activated during emotional pain, which explains why distress can sometimes feel like a real weight on the chest. However, experiencing these feelings creates an opportunity to transmute emotional pain into physical activity.

“When you run or do any physical activity, your brain releases endorphins, chemicals that make you feel good,” explains Armstead. It is sometimes known as the runner’s euphoria: Exercise stimulates the production of neurotransmitters and dopamine, which are essential for mood regulation. “Running gives your mind the space to process grief or pain while allowing the body to release repressed emotions. “It doesn’t erase the pain, but it provides a healthy outlet to manage it,” he says.

Dakari Quimby, PhDclinical psychologist Help Guide Manualechoes this sentiment. “Many find that exercise not only helps them distract themselves from emotional pain, but also improves their mood,” he says. “Sports can introduce a new routine and social opportunities, which are helpful in very emotional times. These activities also reduce the level of stress hormones, which helps relieve symptoms of grief and stress.”

One study 2023¹published in the Journal of affective disorders, examined the effects of antidepressants versus running therapy and how they interact with people’s physical and mental health. The researchers found that group running therapy was comparable to, and even superior to, the effects of antidepressants, underscoring the profound implications of physical activity and its relationship to mental health.

“Constant running and other forms of exercise not only help with physical endurance but also develop emotional resilience,” explains Quimby. “Committing to running consistently can help you achieve your goals, making you feel empowered and boosting your confidence, especially after a relationship ends.”

He adds that resilience developed through physical activity, particularly running, can play a critical role in how future relationships are managed and maintained. “Running symbolizes personal growth; it is about setting personal challenges and overcoming them, which can be a profound metaphor for emotional recovery and resilience.”

“When I run or move my body, I feel like a weight is lifted from my chest. “I feel like I’m showing up for myself.” —Lydia Baker

Three people tell how running helped them recover from their heartbreak

Razan Khatib, 21, started running after his last breakup. “At first I started exercising more, which led me to running,” he says. “I started during the winter and when I felt the cold air hit my face as I ran, it made me feel like I could physically run away from my pain. The closest way I felt like I could leave my body (and everything that consumed me) behind was by running. “I felt really good and it really healed me.”

When someone is going through the emotional fallout of a breakup, their self-esteem can take a hit, according to Armstead. Running or maintaining any form of physical discipline helps to regain that confidence in stages. By setting goals (like running one mile and then increasing it to two) and achieving them, you reinforce the belief that you are capable.”

Like Khatib, Nassiba Vargas gained new confidence after taking up running. “It’s something you hear all the time, but you never believe it until it happens to you,” he says. “I wanted to prove to myself that I can be strong, even in difficulties. “I see myself differently than when I started.”

Lydia Baker, 23, who also took up running due to a recent breakup, shares that running opened a path to other physical activities and mentions that over time she was able to form a healthier relationship with herself.

“These last two years were very difficult for me and I felt like I needed to change something quickly.” she says. “I wanted to start running because everyone around me was doing it, but it ended up opening more doors for me than I thought. I started making it a routine and even started doing other exercises like yoga and pilates. When I run or move my body, it feels like a weight is lifted from my chest. “I feel like I’m showing up for myself.”

How to start a sustainable running routine

“Start small,” advises Armstead. “Don’t think about running a marathon; Think about running for 10 minutes. It’s about building momentum. You don’t just run to be faster, you run to feel better. And sometimes, just getting out there and moving your body can be the spark you need to get your mind back in the game. Add a little mindfulness. Use those first steps as a time to reconnect with yourself. It’s not about running fast, but about running with intention.”

It’s important to set achievable goals, adds Quimby. “Even a five-minute jog is beneficial. Scheduling exercise during times of day when you feel most energetic can make it easier to get started. Also consider running with a friend for extra motivation and support. Remember, celebrating small victories can also provide an important emotional boost,” he says.

Resilience, discipline and perseverance are learned by running; This is especially true as you slowly train yourself to manage stress and stay calm under pressure. “When you ride hard miles, you learn to deal with discomfort, which is a skill you need in relationships,” Armstead says. “Just like with personal growth, you don’t always see immediate results, but if you keep going, you get stronger.”

Armstead likes to remind his athletes that mental performance is just as crucial as physical training. “Whether you’re overcoming emotional pain or striving to achieve a new personal best, the mental game is everything. Thanks to this, we all win, not because it is easy, but because we choose to move forward.”

The final result

While buying new running shoes And logging miles regularly may not magically erase your heartache; At the very least, it can give you a space to be fully present and grounded while analyzing your thoughts. There is a sense of comfort in knowing that your journey is completely unique to you and will bring you a lot of clarity. Remember not to be too hard on yourself as you move forward with grace. Embrace the comfort your journey will bring you, one step at a time.